TIGER GATECRASHES RUSSELL’S AND KATY’S WEDDING!
Everyone will certainly remember this £300,000 wedding! While having an Indian themed wedding in the jungle, a wild tiger came running through and having a history of having eaten two people before, this wasn’t a wedding everyone hoped for! While the tiger was going to jump over a 50 ft wall, the guards beat it away. Although a tiger ruined their wedding, Russell raises money for tigers. Katy Perry wore a blue sari while Russell Brand was wearing a nude coloured kurta. They also had a fortune telling parrot that picked out cards which said that they were going to have a long and happy marriage. Russell gave Katy a ruby which is said to give protective powers while Katy gave him a baby elephant.
Xhesi
ReplyDeleteYou have communicated some of the key elements of the story and used an appropriate headline to get the attention of the reader.
This is a PASS.
To improve your writing, in a short article like this you should stick to only one or two key ideas. If you add too many pieces of information, it feels like the story jumps around all over the place.
To improve this you could focus just on the tiger element of the story and tell the audience about that. This will help the clarity of your story.
Mr Monahan